My Unofficial Christmas Letter

This one is going to be about me.  I usually gloss over what I do because I don't like to brag but hey, I'm going for it!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas or Happy Late Hanukkah or Thankshanukkah or whatever you celebrate!  This has been an interesting and exciting year for us, full of minor fender benders Yes, even a little one including two of our own cars- one of which was parked.  Actually, both children have had an accident with another parked car in our driveway.  (I'm beginning to suspect our driveway is dangerous.)  A word of experience to all parents of future drivers out there.  It doesn't matter how responsible your child is, they will have an accident.  I recommend AAA's towing service. (And sometimes you will have to replace the tires on your daughter's car one by one as she manages to destroy 3 within one week's time.)

Our biggest news of the year was that I found out James was a porn addict.  Not the best news or what I ever expected to find out but sometimes you find out really sucky things!  So, I am pretty disappointed and disgusted and occasionally mad/sad/numb about that.  But the couple of days I just stayed in bed because of it, my husband stepped up and didn't complain.  Not that he really could have said anything.  I mean what would you say?  "Sweetie, I know you are laying in bed because you're super distraught over my virtual cheating, excessive porn use and beginning escalation but I'd really like you to make dinner."  No, you really can't.  Unless you are stupid.  So, clearly my husband had not lost complete functioning in his frontal lobes. YAY!

The good news is that James is on the path to recovery and has 4 months sobriety.  The bad news is that his frontal brain functioning is not yet 100% evidenced by his asking me if I wanted to celebrate his four month sober anniversary.  I obviously said, "Yes, why don't I give you a cookie every time you don't look at porn!"  Addicts are a little dumb.

I look forward to a year of chocolate, book reading, watching stupid TV and a porn-free husband.  

How pathetic is that?

In my opinion, only the porn-free husband because that should be taken for granted!

love,

Elizabeth

***I actually love that phrase: Porn-Free Husband it's like Free-Range Children but with a really vile allusion.  Now I have blog naming angst.  ARGGGG, maybe I should switch?